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dreams, so vivid

Friday, April 22, 2016

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WHAT I’M WEARING: CHICWISH GREY MARL FRILL DRESS, ZARA MAN HAT,RIVER ISLAND ESPADRILLES, ASOS SUNGLASSES & BALENCIAGA BAG

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I go through phrases of vivid dreams, and these days, with my bedroom windows wide open, I wake up to them standing straight over my bed. Sometimes they soak right into my pillows and my eyes open sad. But above all, strangely, I can remember them in the same way I could describe yesterday. By lunchtime, I cannot decipher what happened and what didn’t, checking my phone for texts I received in my sleep, wondering about words never really said and so on. Or there I will be, walking down the street, music blaring through my ears and an emotion will come ; a swirl of a response to an event I thought occurred some time ago but it didn’t, only in my head while I was in bed.

How strange, it challenges my mental balance and leaves me swirling between what’s real and what I only dreamt. With time, they wash away, to be replaced with a new wave of imagined realities that feel as real as my hands. I cannot help but blame the full moon, a cycle I feel in my own body, which sounds quite crazy, I know. But a full moon supercharges me, I have wild energy, even when I am asleep, it seems. I’ve been writing a lot, planting pages of words I hope will grow into something one day, but who knows. Until then, here I am, existing, breathing in these almost summer days, hopeful for this weekend and wondering about the world, or more aptly, this tiny little world I clutch at and call my own. It’s a lovely thing isn’t it? Our little worlds, we all have one, tucked inside this great big globe.

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