I want you to know that we all wonder about the same things. We all sigh at the mirror. We all cry at a desk or in bed, privately over a sad silly thing. Loneliness will hit you unexpectedly like a wave but be sure, we all feel it, wordlessly at home or more overwhelmingly so when we are in the midst of many people. We’ve all told at least one lie that we’ve since sealed in shame. Don’t worry, there are some truths impossible to utter and in silence they should stay. There are some thoughts you can’t tell anyone and that’s okay, there is depth in all you are that remains unseen. The past feels like a dream, all the people and all those places you once knew, it is strange. Looking back is a shadow most often best kept away. Life is made of pieces, as are we and things shaped in pieces are meant to break. Find solace in that what needs mending will mend and what’s left irreparable deserved to dissappear. There will be days that will burn so bright, keep them close, cherish and return to them- you will need that warmth on the days that bleed into a gray of nothing at all. You must let go sometimes – life can pull our threads tight and sometimes we must unravel, just a little. There is no shame in your untied or frayed or loose threads, let them hang and sway with you as you amble along. . It is okay to feel frustrated until it scorches into anger red. It is natural to feel a sadness so vague it sinks you. Gather courage from the dusts of your bad decisions and polish your mistakes silver, so you don’t shake into them again. You own a story that is all your own – write it the way you like, chapters will certainly veer off in disaster but it is up to you to scribble them back into happy endings. And it is quite alright to have entire chapters scrawled messily in a note form that makes no sense. I want you to know it’s okay to feel messy and chaotic – it’s alright. Self-confidence ebbs and flows, but I hope you know nothing changes except your state of mind. You are still all your good traits on the bad days. Life isn’t always an adventure, it’s often a series of simpler pursuits, find joy in those rather than yearning for all the infinite ‘one days’ we store away. Don’t worry about your hair or eyebrows too much. The shape of your thighs doesn’t much matter all that much either. Your body is never ugly, it is your only home. Be sure to honour your brain, don’t neglect it’s power, tend to it with an enthuasiasm that will make you smarter. Close your eyes sometimes, breathe into the words ‘I am, I am, I am’ – that is all you need and it is all you will ever truly have. Be brave enough to walk away, the desire to leave is reason enough for farewell but stick like glue to a select few. Avoid clutching at bold certainities; absolutely everything is absolutely unknown. And even when you seem surest, life confounds and confuses you in a swirling quiet way, in ways you keep shyly to yourself… and I want you to know that that is perfectly okay. You are doing perfectly okay.
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