This here is one of my favourite doors in my neighbourhood, it’s about half a block from my apartment and across the street from one of my preferred coffee spots. July will mark two whole years of living in Eixample, Barcelona and in that time it has really grown into ‘my’ corner of the city, I’m happy to say it feels like home around here. The couriers all know my name, often stopping me on the street if I have a package, the fed-ex lady is almost a friend in fact, the mailman has officially coined me ‘Hepburn’ and should I see any of the others, UPS, DHL, MRW at the supermarket or the corner cafe, we will say ‘hola’ in that vague not-stranger, smiley way. The women at my lunch spot know just how I prefer my carrot juice, I gift clothes to their daughters and they know what I’ve been up to before I tell them because they see it on instagram. The manager at one of the fancier restaurants happily offers his terrace or bar for my photoshoots at a minute’s notice and I see him everywhere. Then there are the four old ladies ofcourse, with their poofy dogs and shoulder-padded blazers who I always make small talk with. My doorman very often asks after my father and from time to time, he will show me photos of his daughter in my unwanted clothes; which always makes me smile. The receptionist at the gym finally knows my name, months after remembering and reciting hers. The french man who owns the florist too has just about remembered that I am not French, a mistake he’s been making monthly since I moved in here.
what i’m wearing: nakd fashion off shoulder tied sleeve denim top, nakd fashion culotte jeans, vintage dior scarf via etsy, strathberry nano taupe bag & le silla pointed pumps
They say the city is a lonely place and while a lot of Barcelona is still so unknown to me, this little cross-section is so comfortably familiar to me. I said I was going to leave, I promised myself I would move, I moaned about my discontent and then, just when I was finally actually gearing up to go, my mood shifted and I decided simply to stay. This makes me sound insane, I know but I have very little faith in my sanity anyhow… Dating the wrong men last year showed me versions of the city I really didn’t like, but, this year being alone, I fell in love with another version entirely: my own. One that feels like home. I am making friends, I am meeting all kinds of men, meanwhile Marta and I have been having such fun together, late night escapes or coffee or simply sitting at my table talking until our mouths physically tire… and ofcourse we are already planning weekend jaunts to Sitges and beaches beyond.So once again, I have changed my mind entirely, my decisions and emotions, so often flip a drastic 360. I suppose my life could be summarized into the chaos of falling in and out of love with people and places. It is manic being so fickle, I am a constantly swinging pendulum of opinion and it will inevitably get to a point where no one will take what I say seriously. How could they?! I don’t even believe myself, really. I am absolutely ridiculous. And so on that note, I will keep all other dithering for the inside of my mind and leave you with an easier kind of consideration: double denim and vintage dior. I actually scored the scarf on etsy for 24 dollars. The denim are two seperates I demanded into a co-ord, and they are both on their fourth re-wear. I guess my clothes are more stable than I am, which must account for something right? Fashion favours the fickle, right?
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